Bear with me as I try to explain this…
I’ve always been frustrated with my inability to sustain ‘habits’ like regular exercise, going to bed on time etc.
But after reading a few things on habits it’s finically clicked – those things I listed above are not habits!!
A habit is what links one behaviour to another. It’s not the behaviour in itself, but the fact that in our mind we so strongly associate those two behaviours, that the first one automatically triggers the second.
So that means – behaviours that aren’t linked to another behaviour and are just floating around in the land on good intentions, can’t become habits.
For example – washing my hands is not a habit. Walking to the bathroom sink and turning on the tap AFTER I’ve been to the toilet IS the habit.
Daily exercise isn’t a habit… walking to my bedroom and putting my work out clothes on after my son leaves for school is the habit.
The next habit is: when I have my workout clothes on I walk to the living room, turn on my tv and load up the workout video.
The next habit is: when the workout video starts playing I follow the instructions.
HOW WELL I DO THE WORKOUT is not the habit. The habit is STARTING not SUCCEEDING.
Anyway – if you are struggling with building a habit, it could be because it’s floating around in space and needs to be linked to something specific.
This is a great YouTube that explains this better than I have here: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=nxjKup00oF8
Also – this book explains it in much more detail: https://www.amazon.com.au/Atomic-Habits-Proven-Build-Break/dp/0735211299
And this blog post: https://www.nirandfar.com/habits/
The habit is not the thing! It’s the thing between the things!